Will the marvels of technology never cease? The past few years have given us self-driving cars, advanced prosthetics, brains being uploaded to the cloud, and very, very thin condoms.

Yep, that’s right Japan has been manufacturing thin-ass condoms like it’s an Olympic sport. 0.01mm thin, to be exact. Precision is everything you see, especially when it comes to Olympic sports, I mean (you get the point).

The host nation of the Tokyo 2020 Olympic Games says it sees the Olympics as a “golden opportunity” to showcase its record-breaking ultra-thin product and encourage safe sex among athletes.

And how much sex are these Olympiads having? A lot. You put the most physically gifted and fit members of the human race of all genders and sexual orientations all in the same place, what do you think is going to happen?

It makes sense that, in between their protein shakes and crazy workout routines, they’d be able to find time to have massive amounts of sex. They’re practically superhuman and driven by the sheer rapture of being such perfect physical specimens they were born to make sweet love to each other.

Since these athletes don’t want to contract STDs and be forced into early retirement, hundreds of thousands of condoms have been distributed to Olympic athletes during the games over the years.

This tradition gives prophylactic producers a perfect opportunity to promote their products. In Japan, condom makers are hoping the Olympics will be a chance to introduce what they consider their gold-medal winner: the ultra-thin 0.01mm condom.

Not only are they super-thin, these condoms are made from polyurethane. Good news for those allergic to latex.

Japan has been an Olympiad condom manufacturer for decades. Condoms have been Japan’s preferred method of contraception for many years, with birth control only being introduced into the Japanese market in 1999.

Sagami, a leading manufacturer of condoms in Japan stated that the condom resists friction for 10,000 thrusts. They have not tested beyond this number. I am personally curious as to how they tested this in the first place. A condom-testing sex robot?

Have I mentioned that Japan is awesome?

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Akhil was raised by movies, television, and the internet. A never-ending source of absolutely useless information. He would tell you more, but he was distracted by something shiny

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